Tuesday, July 19, 2011

You wanna piece of me?

Let me begin by (re)stating that I can be a bit of an odd duck. Quack quack. (Case and point, I just quacked.) I'll follow that up by adding that I love to entertain.

One of my favorite people to entertain is my roommate Jana. She's rad. And she laughs at ALL of my jokes. I think the two of us have at least one laughing fit per day. I'll go ahead and assume that I don't need to exercise, because all of that laughing- well, it's a work out.

Speaking of workouts, you may remember me mentioning in one of last week's posts, that I am known to, on occasion, randomly round-house kick inanimate objects. This is all relevant, I promise. We're getting to the point soon.

Now that the foundation of this story has been laid, let's journey back to a few nights ago. Jana and I were plopped down on the couches in our living room, enjoying one of our nightly giggle fests. Amidst all of the cackling, she stops and says "Hey Shelly, I think that wall is looking at you funny, you should probably go beat it up."

I glared at the wall as I planned my attack.

I stood up and got ready to charge. (She starts laughing). I'm pretty sure that my game plan was to run at the wall pretending like I was going to body slam it, and then only lightly bump into it. Yes, that was the plan.

My plan did not accommodate the wall having a defensive strategy.


Yes, the wall moved. There's no other way to explain why I ran into it so much harder than anticipated.

Luckily I hit it with my shoulder, you know, like the cops do in the movies when they are knocking down a door. (Which by-the-way, I don't really believe so much anymore. That can't be as easy as they make it look.)

I immediately started yowling in pain and holding my wounded shoulder, and Jana immediately started DYING laughing. It only took a minute for me to be cracking up too, because, I just body slammed a wall. On accident. And that's funny. I literally got in a fight with a wall and lost.

The good news is, I didn't dent the wall, or get a bruise on my shoulder. The bad news is, Jana now has something to forever make fun of me for. Uh oh, now so do all of you. Whoops.

Overall, I feel pretty justified in my attack. After all, the wall was looking at me funny. And everyone knows that you can't go letting walls get away with that kind of thing.

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